It is quite common for a new divorce client to want to take a weak position in litigation or settlement discussions after experiencing the shock and trauma of being served with divorce papers. Perhaps if I respond to my spouse's decision to get divorced by offering to give away the farm, he or she may take me back. Often, even if there was little love left in the marriage, the rejection of the moment to the unaware spouse is enough to make the spouse now seeking the divorce to become more attractive and desirable. In other words, we want what we can't have. The day before the unsuspecting spouse was served with divorce papers, he or she wanted nothing more than to get out of the marriage. Now, the rejected spouse suddenly finds the previously unattractive spouse desirable again.
The reality is that my years of experience have demonstrated that giving away the farm will result in only losing the farm, but will not get the departing spouse back.The conciliatory spouse will usually look desperate and pathetic and will not convey attractiveness to the departing spouse. I tell my client's that time will heal the pain. Once the client realizes that he or she has inherent worth and value and that there is life after the departing spouse, that someone else will likely find the rejected spouse very desirable, then the rejected spouse sees the divorce action differently, becoming angry and wanting to fight and win.I also point out that, in my experience, by taking a winning attitude in responding to a divorce petition, there is a greater likelihood that the departing spouse will view the responding spouse with more respect and possessing self-dignity, which will cause the responding spouse to be more attractive to not only the world at large, but the departing spouse as well.Therefore, it is important to approach a divorce action with a winning attitude from the outset.
The experienced attorneys at Richard Ross Associates, A Family Law Professional Corporation, can expertly guide you in the initial and later stages of a divorce action how to position yourself to protect your financial interests, get more custodial access time with your children, pay less in child and/or spousal support or receive more from the higher wage earner, mitigate potential problems, and get to the end zone feeling like a winner looking forward to the future.