There is no way around it; a divorce is going to change your family dynamic for good. However, it doesn't have to be a knock-down and dragged-out fight if both parties are willing to be amicable. A collaborative, or "out of court" divorce helps both parties to come to an agreement on both sides that is satisfactory. It does require a lot of work in the form of retaining family law attorneys who are familiar with the collaborative process, and the support of other experts such as accountants, therapists and evaluators, if necessary.
The goal of a collaborative divorce is one of ensuring that everyone can walk away from the table satisfied with their decisions. This means that child custody agreements are settled, financial support or division of assets is disposed of equitably, and any remaining issues don't become a headache for either party.
This type of divorce is done outside of the courts, and is guided by the family law attorneys hired by both parties. In the event that the divorce becomes contentious and neither side will settle, the case goes to court. The collaborative lawyers then resign, and new attorneys need to be retained.